One or a million times, in my past I cried and dreamed about that man...
gave him a ton of names and faces
heard his words every night,
then I woke up and faced the nightmare of the reality of the moment.
and cried beating myself, telling myself to try to keep that nightmare happy
to not be alone...
A million times left those nightmare with faces and hard judgements for me.
A million times decided to live first.
A million times looked back
and thought...
There is not for ever curse or a body that can handle it...
Once or a million times went back on my own words, my images
A million times shared my face with a smile trying to find hope.
and another million times more found that pain behind my eyes.
But Once, yesterday, after a bunch of days without even giving a little sight to this page.
Once by accident, because I was looking for some pictures.
I came here and found all those words, all those tears, all the wounds.
and cried again, for that pain, for those lessons I had to learn.
for those horrible years, (2013, 2014 the worst,2015 the nasty).
I, still, don't understand and ask to my self how or why they wanted to kill my spirit and mind?
But... It doesn't matter anymore!!
Yesterday, while letting my tears, like waterfalls, come out of my eyes
because of that pain I allowed to be given to me.
That man...
Appeared in front of me...
Kissed my eyes saying
- Don't waste those tears, they are precious, and I want to save them for those moments when we are so happy we have to combine them with laughter.
That man...
The One I dreamed one or a million times in my past.
The One I was hoping to find everytime I was walking away from every living, named nightmare.
That man!!
After seing me crying over my writings, kiss my tears and exchange them for smiles,
That man, once again, confirmed He is the one I was waiting for and trying to find
That one Dream I wanted to find on those years of hopes and nightmares....
He sent me a message:
**Butterfly wings brought you to me.. a whisper in the desperation of having that someone. the kind you think may exist... but then you laugh at your own silly thoughts... how?... Where?... Impossible, and just accept what stumbles into your path... then that voice raises, not to be ignored anymore, and you know you must find that ONE, ... and you pray harder and more sincere than ever... and God brings her on butterfly wings... she lands on your life ... and your soul is filled.
love at last, happiness... clip this butterflies wings... she must never have the need to fly again**
Then I remembered how I flew around flames trying to make those nightmares happy and got almost killed between their hands like a horrible insect but...
That man... is mine now, my reality, my life
Now I can fly around him,
drink the nectar from his lips
laugh with him
Enjoy life
fear the time to go away without enjoying it enough
and LOVE!
Well... See Ya!!
My sweet reality just got up... time to LOVE!
PIEDELMUNDO!!
Sorry, the pictures are not cronogically ordered!
ResponderEliminar