The e-card was sent on oct the 6th...
today is january the 8th...
looking back there i feel bad for myslf and the people around me, they saw me suffering and tried to help me...
today... after all
i can tell...
im not suffering
im not crying
and i dont want to go back there
i dont belong to those arms anymore
and i dont need him in my life...
if one day he decide to say hi
i´ll say hi back and will offer my friendship
if that day never comes
i´ll be greatfull with him bcz he taught me many things of life and myslf
but more greatfull with the person who showed me i was ready to continue living...
now focus on finding a new boyfriend, before i´m too old and have to find someone to fill a place on a table wishing that person doesnt want to touch me at all... eeewwwww
hahahhaahha
Smiling!!
hope both of them say hi sometime...
October 6; 2013
What i really want...
Talking with a friend today..
She is the one by my side, btw, she is the one who asked me if you said something for her one time
Now her relationship is good, Im glad I had the experience enough to help her
Ok… today she asked me
Bcz, I was so sad…
Did you ask him what is the reason for his actitude?
Did you ask him why he read your messages but don’t say nothing?
By that moment I didn’t respond nothing and she had to take her bus
But I answered those questions to my slf, I imagine you looking at me to kill me if I ask such question…
But, guess what…
Now youre not reading me and you will not…
So I can ask and i´ll receive the same answer
Hun, why?
If many times we fought and when you called me even when I felt you were not right I didn’t ignore you
Why if you read me, why you don’t say nothing even to blame on me?
Why you read me?
if the reason is that youre that loyal and you have someone why you read me??
This is so difficult… member I told you im a difficult person??
So… I am
But im willing to change
I can accept
You spiting in my mouth and hit me everyday if you just say hi…
I can change and stop talking
If you come back to me …
Come back to me… and i´ll be your servant for the rest of my life
I can trade my life
To be with you
To have you again…
Anything, anything for you
To see you smiling and hear your voice
To touch you and kiss your hands
To feel your touch on my skin
To hug you
And taste you again
Anything
I would trade all my smiles
To see yours
I can give out all I have
All I want
Just to feel your arms around me
Or not even for that
Just to see you
behind the cold screen of my laptop
October 6 2013
It was a terrible day yesterday,
I woke up crying because I dreamed of you
And didn’t want to get up
Didn’t want to look at my cellphn
Because I knew there was nothing from you
During my work time was hard
Because everything reminded me of you
The names of my customers
Allan something
People from
Scarborough
Main
Rochester…
Well… that was a terrible morning
Me trying to forget and smile
But all my tears coming at once…
One of my customers, the one from main,
Asked what happened
When I asked for the zip code and I saw the name of that
And my voice got broken he sd
Is everything ok?? I replayed,
Yes…
I asked for the place… he sd yes that´s the area were ill be using my phn the most
Then my system got frozen I asked him..
Sorry, are you by the lake?
And he sd yes I am by the lake
Have you been here??
I sd, no…
Then I couldn’t cont talking
And he asked again
Is everything ok??
I sd with my voice broken
Yes, sir sorry, my system is still frozen I have to open my tools again
Then he said…
No, im asking if you are ok, I know your system is not that good but I think you´re not good neither…
I didn’t respond
Then he said
Sorry youre not ok, God bless you
Then at the end of the day
Told to my friend Kelly
Why? What kind of father is God that enjoy to see me crying?
Im asking him not to mk me forget about Alan
Not to make me hate him
Not to make him come back to me
But to stop this pain in my heart
But he is not helping me
I just want to remind him with a smile without tears
But
I get soaked of tears without smiles…
She told me…
Sorry my friend you feel guilty
And this sorrow wont stop
And the worst is that you didn’t know how you love him…
Now you realized you cant live without him
And is now when you have to try without him…
Today I got up without tears
I thot of you and felt how I wanted to…
Not happiness but no tears.. no terrible pain
Then the destiny
Came with a phrase
Hay teléfonos, e-mails, facebook, twitter, whatsapp, cartas, telegramas y señales de humo. Si no te habla es porque no quiere.
No need to translate since u wont read this….
As my profile picture on fb I got hit on my face and my mouth is bleeding…
At this moment I wish I get in an accident that erase you from my mind
what I really want??
You back… nothing else
If I don’t have you
Tell me a good reason to continue
Like when you feel under the big foot of the world
Piedelmundo…
No hay comentarios:
Publicar un comentario